-- 15 years or so I think... I stopped counting because it freaks me out.

2) Do you enjoy it?

-- Why do something you don't enjoy?

3) Can you do one of those twirly spiny things? You know when you leap up in the air and stuff.

-- *groan* Yes, I can do jumps... I'm not a prancer.

4) Can you do a quad?

-- No (It's at this point that I get the look of disappointment from the person I'm talking to. They thought they actually met someone important, apparently not being able to do a quad is grounds for loser status in the eyes of many)

5) Do you do singles or doubles?

-- (Annoyance level rising) I skate pairs (This is not tennis for crying out loud)

6) Do you and your partner skate at the same place then?

-- Yes every day (does this not seem obvious? How could you train at different places and skate pairs?)

7) Do you and your partner date each other?

-- No, contrary to popular belief, the majority of pair teams do not have sex.

8) Why did you start skating pairs?

-- I went to the tryout camp for the party, no desire to do pairs at all. For some reason I stuck with it.

9) Gee, you don't look like a figure skater?

-- You mean I don't fit the flaming homosexual stereotype you had tucked away in your puny little mind? Most of us are straight you know, we drink beer, burp, fart, and that's just the pair chicks.

10) Skating must be really expensive for you?

11) Are you famous?

-- Are you? If you are then I want your autograph!

12) Have you been on TV?

-- Yes, it's over rated, plus no one really cares when you walk in front of the camera focusing on Elvis picking his nose or tying his shoes.

13) Do you want to go to the Olympics?

-- Who dosen't? Like talk about a party! The pairs event finishes first, then you get like a week and a half to chill in some cool location and party your ass off!

14) Skating must be hard eh?

-- No kidding, tell me something I don't know.

15) I thought all male figure skaters were gay, you don't look gay, are you sure you aren't gay?